Drunken thieves always result in the most entertaining and head-scratch-worthy stories. Take the recent case of the besotted fool in Bowling Green, Kentucky who was roused out of two homes before the police nabbed him. The drunk intruder had his pockets stuffed with unusual loot. In addition to (wait for it) drugs, police found two pickled sausages, two different bottles of cologne – Drakkar Noir and Adidas but none of Charlie Sheen’s Winning – along with some other grooming products.
Like Goldilocks invading the three bears’ house, a man came home and discovered a bloody Benjamin Williams asleep in the bed of the man’s mother in a case similar to that of Michael Karanja Kamau. He scooted him out of his home without even having to drag him by his beard and called the police. Soon after the cops got another call about a snoozing intruder on a couch a block over. It was Williams again, but this time with pants wet from his own urine and the ashes from a hooka pipe smeared all over his face. Even with two sausages in his pockets, apparently Williams turned to the pipe for an ashy snack.