Whatever you do, don’t show up at Marissa Ann Putignano-Keene’s house if you have a previous history of intimacy with her husband Timothy Keene. She just might try to kill you for it. After all, she is accused of trying to run over one of Tim’s ex-lovers at the couple’s wedding, so she’s capable of anything. Spending the night in jail is not the best way to start off your first night of marriage, but maybe she enjoyed the strip-search?
Weirder still, Timothy was in the car with Marissa when she tried to go all Death Race 2000 on the old girlfriend and her son in the parking lot. So he also got some time behind bars, thanks to his wife’s sudden desire to repaint the front of the car red with human blood.
Or… maybe he was trying to avoid his crazy new wife for a bit? That seems like a reasonable conclusion to me. I’d rather be locked up than splattered on the grille of a Buick.
Image: Southern Live Oak
Tags: Marissa Ann Putignano-Keene, Timothy Keene, couple spends first night together in jail, honeymoon in prison, unusual criminals, newlywed criminals, bride tries to run down wedding guests