Jon Stewart Is Leaving The Daily Show
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Vigilante Robot On The Loose!

Posted 3/19/2008 5:00 am by and

picture-2-121.jpgThe Apocalypse always starts out with the best of intentions. Nuclear power is good, because it saves the environment from pollution. Genetic engineering is going to cure all diseases. Robots are going to patrol our streets and keep us safe from loitering thugs and littering punks, like metallic Charles Bronsons. Next thing you know, bam! Terminators everywhere, and I’m not talking about the friendly father-figure or cute girlfriend kind of Terminators; I’m talking about the kind that exist only to kill John Connor and enslave humanity.

Sure, it’s cute and harmless now, but you know what else looks like a fireplug on wheels with a plunger glued on? A Dalek, that’s what. For those unfamiliar with your British sci-fi, I’ll give you a little run-down of just what they are and why they’re scary.

daleknew.jpg

They’re Dr. Who’s greatest nemesis, bent on destroying the last of the Time Lords and conquering the universe. They’re evil to the core, and they look suspiciously like this happy little robot with a built-in water cannon. Same garbage can shape, same dome head, same weapon jutting out, same glowing omniscient eye. All you’d have to do is put on suspensors for traversing stairs, put the controls on the inside of the machine with a little mutant occupant, and replace the water gun with a death beam, and all of a sudden British actors of a certain age become an endangered species.

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