Some people will go to any length to avoid being arrested. For 19-year-old Nicole April Kelly, the phrase “go to any length” also includes hiding in a coffin in a funeral home. When being transported to jail by Juniata County deputies, Ms. Kelly escaped their custody and disappeared for several hours, only to be found hiding in a coffin at the Brown Funeral Home by the parlor’s owner, who detained her until police arrived.
Kelly was in the process of being extradited to another county for arraignment on charges there, but all that’s been put on hold. Now she’s added to her future jail term and is being held on $75,000 dollars bond. Hopefully someone Houdini-proofed her current cell to keep her from going exploring again.
I don’t care how nice the coffin, I think hiding in a corpse box is incredibly morbid. It’s one thing to eat in a casket-shaped restaurant, because there are no actual dead people around. But to hide in a coffin in a funeral home? That’s just asking to be buried alive, and that’s got to be the worst possible way to die.
Image: Mondo Gonzo
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