At one point, it was everywhere. Seriously, you could not escape karaoke. Literally every bar or restaurant you went by advertised that they, too, offered you the chance to get up on stage and screech out a tone-deaf version of your favorite song. Fortunately, if a survey by British trade magazine The Publican can be believed, karaoke is on the decline. Not a moment too soon, if you ask me.
Has there ever been a worse form of bar entertainment? The percentage of people who can sing is significantly lower than the people who think they can sing, and always has been. Of course, the karaoke machine allows the few talented voices to be drowned out by screaming drunks whose sense of decorum is outweighed by the desire to put on a show for the assembled pub-goers, or tone-deaf American Idol rejects who believe that they just might get lucky and be discovered singing along to Whitney Houston at a sleazy dive. If Joe Cocker got a record deal, anything is possible, but let’s be serious here.
I’m not totally against karaoke. Once in awhile, at a theme night or in a Japanese restaurant, it’s okay. I won’t say I haven’t gotten up on stage and butchered a song or two in my time, but I know my limits, I don’t overstay my welcome, I don’t do any songs that require me to throw out a note so high it risks glass fracture, and I definitely don’t get falling-down drunk before I go up.
Please, for the preservation of my eardrums… if you can’t sing, don’t take the mic!
Tags: karaoke, the death of karaoke, singalongs, music, entertainment, bar games, The Publican