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Wildwood, New Jersey Passes Anti-Sagging Fashion Laws

Posted 6/13/2013 7:00 am by
Fashion plate and mayor Ernest Troiano.

Fashion plate and mayor Ernest Troiano.

The war on fashion continues unabated in the town of Wildwood, New Jersey.  On the famous Jersey boardwalk, sagging pants and visible underwear are everywhere, and the town council of Wildwood is sick of all that unwanted boxer shorts action.  The town is so done with sagging that they’re passing laws against wearing your pants too low.  Wildwood, New Jersey has banned sagging pants, among other things.

“I don’t know who comes to the boardwalk and says, ‘Let’s go to the boardwalk and find out how many asses we can see,'” said Wildwood mayor Ernest Troiano.  “Sagging has become very offensive to a number of people.  I’m not trying to be the fashion police, but personally I find it offensive when a guy’s butt is hanging out!”

The law, which will take effect next month, doesn’t just cover sagging pants.  They also have to wear shirts after 8 PM, have to wear footwear at all times while on the boardwalk, and it also allows cops to cite people for wearing too-short skirts and shits that show too much cleavage.  Cops will first warn people to correct the offending fashion violations, or they will face fines of $25 to $200 as well as a possible 40 hours of community service.

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