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There are career criminals, and there’s Doris Thompson.  She’s the definition of career burglar.  At age 80, she just got sentenced to state prison for yet another burglary.  This is her ninth time going into state prison, she’s used 27 different aliases, and she’s got a criminal record dating back to 1955.  And when she […]

When Lydia Carranza got her breast implants, she probably did it for cosmetic reasons.  After all, it’s not like breast implants can stop bullets, right?  Well, normally they can’t, but Lydia Carranza and her surgeons are thanking her falsies for saving her life.  Ms. Carranza was working in a dental office in Simi Valley, California, […]

One of the things about stealing stuff from inside parked cars is that there’s usually a lot of stuff, but not all of it is worth taking.  That’s why 19-year-old Stefanie Vargas and her 13-year-old accomplice spent their time talking about when rummaging through a parked car outside a Daytona Beach, Florida, night club.  Unfortunately […]

Tran Van Hay, who died at age 79, started growing his hair more than 50 years ago because he’d often feel sick after getting haircuts, according to his wife Nguyen Thi Hoa.  It goes without saying that if something makes you feel sick, you probably shouldn’t do it.  That’s the origin of what is believed […]

According to his father Walter, Andrew Koenig’s body was discovered on Thursday.  The actor is believed to have taken his own life.  A group of Koenig’s closest friends in the city invited Walter along on one last sweep of heavily-wooded Stanley Park, where Koenig disappeared, and the 11 of them finally located the Growing Pains […]

If you’ve ever needed another reason to put down your smoking mittens and kick the habit of sucking on flaming butts, here’s another little nudge towards a smoke-free lifestyle.  According to a survey of Israeli military recruits cited in the journal Addiction, those who smoke a pack of cigarettes a day are dumber than non-smokers.  […]

No, Internet, it’s not a trap!  I repeat, NOT a trap.  Since 2003, the University of Mississippi, AKA Ole Miss, has been without a mascot since their previous mascot, a Confederate by the name of Colonel Reb, was retired due to his plantation-owner manner of dress being potentially offensive.  Since then, the Ole Miss Rebels […]

If you want to find yourself living in immortality forever, or at least for a few weeks, then I suggest you head to Thorpe Park in Chertsey, Surrey in the UK.  Why?  Well, if you drink enough coffee and eat enough asparagus, then you just might earn your place alongside burning hair and rotting meat […]

In 2000, Angie Sanselmente Valencia was crowned as Colombia’s “Queen of Coffee.”  Since then she’s been a runway model specializing in lingerie.  Oh yeah, in her spare time?  She’s also built one of the largest drug empires in the world, according to international authorities who have issued a warrant for her arrest.  Last year, at […]

One minute, Dawn Brancheau, a 40-year-old trainer at SeaWorld Orlando was walking around the outside of the tank, explaining facts about whales to a rapt audience.  The next, she was being thrashed from side to side violently by a whale called Telly, short for Tilikum.  Given the whale is 13,500 pounds, there wasn’t much that […]

Talk about the wrong place at the wrong time!  A Florida woman named Samantha Lynn Frazier just wanted to take part in that famous Atlantic City night life.  She headed out to Herman’s Place.  As she walked in, she heard two pops and felt some pain.  When she reached a hand down to her side, […]

Sometimes you have to wonder if the police have too much free time.  That’s all I can ask after finding out that Warren, Michgan police arrested a 71-year-old cable television producer for selling bootlegged polka DVDs.  Fred DeChausse, the producer of Polka Party on the local cable access channel, has been accused of using public […]

If you’re a puppet in Colorado Springs, Colorado, you’d better cover up your decolletage.  If you don’t, you might find yourself banned from putting ads on the sides of bus shelters.  That’s what happened to the touring production of Broadway hit and Tony-winning Avenue Q, a naughty puppet show/musical hybrid.  The show’s racy ad has […]

During his radio show, in the process of making some jokes, Tony Kornheiser, the cohost of Pardon The Interruption and former analyst on Monday Night Football, made a couple cracks about some of his fellow ESPN characters.  He discussed SportsCenter anchor Hannah Storm’s penchant for dressing like Britney Spears (red patent leather go-go boots, short […]